Saturday, November 24, 2012

So, UiTM Idol 2012

Yesterday, I joined UiTM Idol for the second time
And it was totally last minute
Even people might say I'd ample time to prepare, I do agree to that
However, I was having a very busy week
Therefore, I had less time to focus on my song and my performance
Last year, I was entitled the Best Performer, much to my surprise
I hoped to maintain the title to myself
I did whatever preparation that I managed to do
I chose Addicted by Kelly Clarkson
The theme of the performance was the same like last year, despair but more destructive
Putting on more eye make up and dirty nails using pencil eye liner
I was voted to be number 8 out of 22 participants
There were so many prizes, unlike last year's competition
I was hoping to at least get one of the hampers
But I'd no idea what to prepare
It was because the judges were different
They were 2 school music teachers and 1 lecturer of UiTM's Music lecturer
Too schematic than artistic, I guess
Last year, we had Anna Raffali as one of the judges
Then, I just did what I thought was best for my performance
I was crawling, running back and forth, going crazy, pulling out hair, made almost crying face, etc.
Trying to portray addiction sensation
I thought I nailed it the way I thought I had
Then, Lena AF came to entertain us
She was awesome
I was thinking to take picture with her but I was too tired
The theme for the night was retro
And I had no idea of that
Kalau tak, lehla amek lagu desperate zezaman dulu
Feeling lebih sikit kot
Kot. Hahaha.
Then, it was the time to announce the winners
The main prizes were the UiTM Idol, 1st and 2nd runner-ups, best performer, best dress, and people's choice awards
I was not in any positions mentioned, even the consolation prizes
To be honest, I was in despair
It was something that I think I love ever since I was little
Lena was right, to start a singing career, u need a real supporter
The rock that u can lean on
Because being an artiste is not easy
Slanders everywhere
Then, it brought me to think about, what should I do since what I think I like to do was not approved by anyone
Nobody thinks and really support my singing
What should I do?
People said, u should do things that makes u happy, that u really have interest in to make u feel happier and less sruggling
Is that correct?
I've no idea to that
I've no idea, what should I really do?
Should I keep on studying to be my niche by doing researches and giving lectures?
But I don't like that much
So, what should I do?
A question that is so hard to answer
Maybe I should go for addiction
To release my inhibition
Maybe...



XOXO


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