Wednesday, June 16, 2010

so, breaking down is a feeling...






I have been so down lately, for most of the time...
I dunno what is exactly the thing I should do to make me feel I am myself..
I only sure that only singing can make me feel I'm okay..
But I can't do it every now and then for the time being cuz the time and place is no convinient...
My voice doesn't sound that good, I admit that...
However, it's the only thing to make me feel okay...
So, I'm breaking down into pieces so much...
It's true, it's hard to make everybody happy...
But that's the only thing I can do cuz making people around me happy will make me happy but mostly it hurts me cuz I can't be that free...
I just feel so bad about everything happening to me...
I don't really know what kind of element I am supposed to be in...
I just don't feel right for whatever happens now...
I'm so emotional...
I dunno how to make it feels so right...
I have lost counts of this kind of moments to be happening to me...
They are so countless...
I dun really feel I have friends...
I dun really feel I'm exist...
I dun really feel I'm alive...
Having said these, that makes me feel how awfully ungrateful I'm now...
I'm being unfair...
I dunno how to feel anymore...
I'm doing things that I think that would make me feel better but it seems to be very unsuccessful...
I'm sucked at everything I do in my life...
People always thought of me having great life, blah3...
They don't really know who I am...
I am so sorry for being very conservative...
That is because my life is very awful...
I'm so sorry guys for I cannot be so open, to share everything cuz the truth is very ugly, very out of imaginations...
I dunno how can I summon the courage that I once have it...
I'm totally at the edge of breaking down that I can't really talk it down with anybody else...
By saying this, at least, it really put me at ease a little bit now...
Knowing at least there is somebody who care to read...
I'm thankful for that...
I dunno when would be the time people would really lend me a hand, give me support I am searching for, offer me affection I am needing...
I'm breaking down...
Leona Lewis do me a great deal of good, I think...
Spirit (Deluxe Edition) (Incl. Bonus Tracks and Bonus DVD) (PAL Version)
 
I dun mind to feel emotional...
That's what I wanna feel rite now...
I'm listening to her rite now...
I should think the things that I need to finish up...
So, all the best to me...


: )

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